P2H3 Run #932 – Dry Feet

Date: 20/9/2009

Hares:  Phlegm (running), Chickpea & Baby Louise (walking)

Run Report:  Blah Blah

As the pack set forth the hare did declare that all feet shall remain drieth for the length of yonder run.  “The hare has gone softeth,” the pack did loudly declare.  Yet in the secret part of their hearts, wherein lies wonton, covetous longings for their neighbour’s attractive spouse, they were glad. [Hops 13:05]

It would appear that the previous week’s run/swim had a left an indelible mark on the hares as Phlegm, ChickPea & Baby Louise sought far and wide for a run that would keep the feet free of the hydrogen-oxygen combination that all hashers both love and fear (the former on a run, the latter as a drink).  Hence the Pchum Ben reduced pack trundled off to somewhere near the Kandal/Takeo/Kampong Speu border for a saunter amongst the rather pleasant rice paddies and irrigation channels.

Enough of the run.  It was a run.  If you were there, you know it.  If you weren’t I don’t have sufficient space to be eloquent and you should have been there.  Observations though, ah, they are another matter entirely.

OBSERVATION #1:  Phlegm has athlete’s foot.  This can be the only reason Phlegm worked so hard (including looping back upon himself) to avoid water.  He was afraid the tinea fungi would get into the water and affect the entire population of the region and this outbreak would result in an international WHO mission that would trace the source back to him.

OBSERVATION #2:  Little Boy is Usain Bolt.  I know he doesn’t look Jamaican however it is all a front.  Little Boy’s decision to forgo the opportunity to join the walkers at the halfway and to remain with the runners for a fast paced 9km run has exposed him for who he really is.  What Madame Ovaries will make of this discovery remains unknown at the time of writing though unofficial sources report she is rather pleased.

OBSERVATION #3:  Runs Well is sneaking beer from the vats at work.  What else to make of the Hash Beer’s decision to short cut the way home?  We thoroughly commend Runs Well for his actions (beer theft that is) and urge all hashers to take a similar approach to their own employment; especially if it involves beer.

OBSERVATION #4:  Abuser harbours a secret desire to star on COPS.  Determined to get lost and instigate a province wide, fully televised woman hunt (tapes of which would be sent to AXN), Abuser took a detour and covered her tracks to prevent pursuit.  Unfortunately her sense of direction was so bad that instead of getting lost she accidentally found the truck again.

OBSERVATION #5:   Cat Walk Boy is the inspiration for Aerobics Oz Style.  We were surprised as well I can assure you.  A real revelation from the circle, that was.  The question is which one did he inspire?  Footloose assures me it is all of them……at once.

OBSERVATION #6:  Herring Choker is fluent in Khmer.  He quite clearly must be given the way he was asking the locals for directions whilst FRB.

OBSERVATION #7:   Baby Louise Lambiotte can run.  She may not be able to walk or talk but running and spraying cans of paint appear no problem as this erstwhile hasher was named hare.  A good start and one that raises some questions as to why other hashers which share similar characteristics (crying when upset, demanding to fed whenever feeling hungry, enjoying a good cuddle whilst belching) have failed to set runs in recent times.  You know who you are.

On On

Blah Blah