P2H3 Hash Trash Blog

The Muscle Wine Drinking Club With a Slimy Dyke Problem

P2H3 – Run #848, In Memory of Dog on Heat

Posted by p2h3hashtrash on March 31, 2008

P2H3 Logo GPS Map Track photos_815_815-16.jpg

Run Date: 30/03/2008

Hares: Phlegm, Runs Well, Piglet, Hit on Me

A large pack congregated across the Mekong in virgin territory for run 848. On this day, all were thinking of an absent hasher, Dog on Heat. Hashers pinned black ribbons to their shirts (well done, Hash Haberdashery) and a minute’s silence was observed. Afterwards, Runs Well said a few words in Khmer in memory of his friend and co-partner in FRBastardry and we sang the Hash anthem, Swing Low Sweet Chariot, the words taking on extra meaning.
So run 848 was ‘a Phlegm run’. A Phlegm run typically involves a boat of uncertain seaworthiness, eccentric trail marking techniques, quagmires and morasses, massive distances and numerous other hardships. All were in evidence once again. The contributions of Piglet and Hit on Me made sure the walkers had a much easier time of things.

(Perhaps Phlegm is some sort of human divining rod, driven by forces beyond his ken to encounter watercourses wherever he can, even in the dry season.) Anyway, his trail led the runners across some interesting country — the little section through a plantation of gum trees was a shady highlight for me. Flip Flop‘s blatant racing and reckless overtaking here was noted by hashtrash but somehow went unpunished later.

There was then a detour into a morass of lotus plants and scratchy scrub where the trail became hard to find. A stream was forded with difficulty. Some newer hashers attempted to leap across and landed deep in mud on the other side. Mr Tinkle (?) lost his shoe doing the same thing. Others spread out along the banks attempting to find an easier way across. The way then led up to a road climbing along a small ridge where the runners met a hash hold and took in the view of fields and a darkening skyline.  A very pleasant spot to wait and compare how much one is sweating.  FRBs were not surprised to see that one of the Blitzkrieg twins had arrived before them.

Realising that his trail still had several hundred miles to go and the day was getting late, the hare co-opted Runs Well and took off on a live haring run. The baying pack followed their flour drops down to the river and then back to the start, where the walkers were already home and drinking all the beer.

The circle was presided over with the usual enthusiasm combined with hungover incompetence by retiring GM HE Blackout, RA Blah Blah and stand-in choirmaster and full-time hash Maharishi Tokyo Joe. Of the sinners punished, the most egregious crime came from the man with the second-worst shorts in the Hash, Flying Plod. Plod had been heard to say that the one thing he didn’t want after his big night was a beer. Never was a down-down more justified. Whoever snitched is definitely to be congratulated.

Erections are on their way!!  The candidates are jostling for votes.  Dirt files have been seen.  Whispering campaigns have started.  Kramas and favours are being distributed like mad.  Only wildcard Paddington Bra seems to be above the general moral degeneracy at the moment.   Make sure you attend the erections.

The on on on was at that joint with the beer rockets. By the time the truck arrived the Politburo chiefs were already gorging themselves on caviar and truffles. A good restaurant, but hungry hashers need refueling immediately.

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7 Responses to “P2H3 – Run #848, In Memory of Dog on Heat”

  1. Rubbed Raw said

    Another Report worthy of praise Ikea, good job. I admit that I joined Mr Tinkle in the loss of shoe. I should have learned better than to follow Tinkle’s example by now!! Well done Phlegm on setting another top trail, full of interest and suprises!

  2. Rubbed Raw said

    No prizes for guessing which hasher has the worst shorts on the Hash!!

  3. Ikea said

    It was a good trail… Mr Phlegm never sets boring runs.

    The FRB view of a run can be pretty limited, I’m sure there was plenty of scandal (and scenery) I missed.

  4. Ikea said

    “Worst shorts in the hash…”

    Everyone is welcome to guess, but yes don’t expect to be rewarded for it.

  5. Blah Blah said

    Of course there is always the mitigating factor of whose derriere they adorn with such aplomb….

  6. Blah Blah said

    or is that amplifying factor…..?

  7. Flip Flop said

    Racing, me, not possible – false charge as I am definitely beyond such things!
    BTW, there were at least another 2-3 Hounds who lost a shoe in the quagmire!
    It was a good run in wonderful scenic territory and well done Phlegm for cutting the usual ‘Phlegm run’ back to simply a ‘long run’ 🙂

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