P2H3 Hash Trash Blog

The Muscle Wine Drinking Club With a Slimy Dyke Problem

Archive for April, 2008

P2H3 Run #853 – PP Full Moon Run

Posted by p2h3hashtrash on April 25, 2008

Danger Hash!

Hares: Flip Flop, Lilia Tyrell

Run Date: 20/04/2008

Run Report: Phlegm (in Benglish)

This first Full Moon H was decided the same day on the truck going back to Phnom Penh after a good Flacido Domingo trail in Takhmao. After a few beers, a pink moon appeared on the left side of the road close to the Bassac River. Flip Flop saw it the first and proposed a night trail in Phnom Penh. Majority agreed specialy all the excited girls (including Love Bite) on the top of the cabin’s driver.

90% of the hashers from the On on on started the run & walk from the Chinese restaurant close to the Central Market: around 16 walkers and at least 6 crazy runners. The trail was marked with flour and the lucky Flip Flop made a live Hare with the nice Lilia Tyrell. Before leaving around 8H30 PM, the hares informed us that every corner should be Chekings. So, after 30m, the first check around was Monivong and Kampuchea Krom, one of the most busy corner of the capital. Walkers turned right direction Railway station with a body gard on his motorbike: Check Around. FRB Hugo Hotte from Canada Quebec, Flacido Domingo, Two Dogs, Love Bite and some virgins disappered in the night looking for marks in the dark…

Isodora Tang, new virgin in P2H3, complimented about her divine choice at the Sambo restaurant, was in front of the walkers when we arrived at Le Royal Raffles Hotel and later to her lightened Embassy. Piglet, Hit on Me and Padington Bra followed and ran to join us at the dark Wat Phnom Park reached precisely at 8H50 PM regarding the giant clock. Every night at that moment, under the trees, there are some Cambodian girls ready to give warmth… Suddently, we lost Fester. And Come Red Plodsky, returnee from New Zealand arrived late at the “On ! On ! On !” Velkommen Inn.

Arriving close to the post office, we checked a few girly streets to find the end. Finally, Herring Choker and his staf welcomed us with fresh beers and thousands pop corn. (clever guy with this so hot night). We founded the two hares very excited arguiing that we didn’t follow the good trail. Eh! Try to check at the Cambodian boulevards with the crazy drunk drivers at night time!!! Anyway, everybody enjoyed that first Full Moon H and the end of the night could have been an orgy in a private swimming pool… (HT – not sure what was going on at the end here!)

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Posted in Event Hash, Run Report | 4 Comments »

P2H3 – Run #852: Flaccido’s Flaccidity

Posted by p2h3hashtrash on April 24, 2008

 

Run date: 20/04/2008

Hare: Flaccido Domingo

Run Report: HE Blah Blah

Flaccido Domingo took the pack up the river near Takmau to face his demons by returning to the scene of his 17km no half-way ball buster from last year. Needless to say there was a certain amount of trepidation from the pack and cries of “it’s a short one” from Flaccido failed to ease concerns.
Nonetheless the pack set off with Hugo and Herring Choker immediately finding the half way point. We knew it was short but surely not this short… no it wasn’t, the pack was called on-back by the hare as there was a cross on the opposite side of the road to the marks and out we went amongst small farms and shady lanes.

Runs Well found himself ahead of the pack once more after a check revealed another check which resulted in a short cut (more howls of protest from Flaccido) and then we were into the paddy fields where Phlegm and Mr Tinkle decided to take a short cut to a remote temple that the trail never went anywhere near. Needless to say the pack did not sight them for some time.

After the half way it was a relatively simple run though cries of “on on Sarsy” from Flip Flop continued to confuse the pack given Sarsy’s maintenance of his traditional position near the back of the pack. Mr Tinkle eventually resurfaced as he and Yap Yap pursued a mob of cows down a lane, much to the amusement of the waiting FRB’s. There was a moment of bovine defecation as the cows went past which Mr Tinkle attributed to the poor beast’s sighting of Flaccido.

Eventually the pack returned to the gentle strains of a local wedding where Love Bite took up the mantle of RA for the evening. Down downs were given for many spurious reasons ranging from Mr Tinkle for being English through to Comrade Plodsky for being missing in action for a few years. Prick of the week was awarded to Leaking Duck for being a blatant land baron.

So it turned out that Flaccido is capable of setting short runs, but don’t get used to it.

*Hashtrash note: Big ups to Blah Blah for this run report and Tinkle and Wide Angle for theirs. All Hashers are welcome to write something in whatever kind of English – Cambodia-english, French-glish, Germenglish, Japan-glish, Jon English, even Canadian English – it doesn’t matter. WordPress can also handle Khmer so we await our first report in Khmer (also see Khmer blog link)…

Posted in Run Report | 2 Comments »

God Save Our Aubergine!

Posted by p2h3hashtrash on April 18, 2008

The aubergine, official vegetable of the Phnom Penh Hash, was presented by Tokyo Joe to the Mighty Quinn of Saigon Hash House Harriers on the auspicious occasion of the 850th running of the P2H3. In the photo, Festering Chronic Masturbator looked on in awe (see below). The run was held in Can Tho, Vietnam as a joint run with the SH3. The Vietnamese aubergine is a poor cousin to the Cambodian aubergine, being green, small and lacking any bulbous protruberances. It was a poor replacement to the original, which was held up in a quarantine shed at the Phnom Den border crossing.
Sadly the traditional secret ritual, followed by cooking it into a curry and serving it to the victim, did not take place, as time did not permit. The bow-tie tarted it up a bit however.
“God Save Our Aubergine” was sung to close the event in a ceremony that was both simple, yet dignified.
ON ON

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GM Blackout resigns

Posted by p2h3hashtrash on April 17, 2008

Blackout in action

GM of the Phnom Penh Hash, Blackout, — seen here looking for a shortcut — has stepped down from his position, citing fairly boring but sensible reasons.

His reign has been a bounteous and eventful time for the Hash, with many new feet and a lot of fun in the circle. All the best to Blackout and Insider, we look forward to your downs downs as returnees one day. Now bugger off!

In other matters, here are two highlights from the Yap Yap Hash Snap retrospective:

HashTrash Note: Photos deleted due to irrelevance – go to hash Snaps

Posted in Announcements | 3 Comments »

P2H3 Run #850: Outstation Run – Can Tho, Vietnam

Posted by p2h3hashtrash on April 17, 2008

Run Report: Blah Blah

Run Date: 17/04/2008 (Khmer New Year)

Hares: Saigon HHH

The Bus Diaries – a journey of discovery

Shaking off the cob webs after two days of free beer would be challenging for any, however to do it at 6:30am was the hurdle set by Tokyo Joe as a group of intrepid hashers met outside Wat Lanka for a trip to join the Saigon H3 in Can Tho, Vietnam. The day started off well, we made good time, we were in high spirits, we arrived at the wrong border crossing. Yes, despite the flagrant use of Tokyo Joe’s GPS, the bus company took us to Chrey Thum crossing only to discover foreigners cannot cross. Back on the bus, back up the Bassac, back to Takmau and back on to the original plan of going to Phnom Den. Despite losing a couple of hours the pack was still feeling the love, with Josh in particular taking the extra time to muse the mysteries of lactating males and a series of photos he recently saw of what sounded like a mass mooning exercise. Still we were not to be beaten and once through the border crossing were on our way when…. thump…..our new bus driver managed to clean up two motorcycles in one cunning maneuver. Off to the clinic we go.

Needless to say after all of these delays we arrived at the end of the hash and hence missed the first run. Still, enthusiasm abounded and donning the P2H3 silk bow ties supplied by Tokyo Joe we made our way to the dinner and later in the evening to the Mekong Restaurant where Flying Plod, Blah Blah & Mr Tinkle took particular delight in joining the silken clad Just Add Beer in a rendition of songs eminently suitable for children television shows. Magic Mushroom and Tinkle Spinner set about charming the Saigon Hash with their usual aplomb and Saigon Hasher Pencil Dick pitched in with a particularly fine ad-libbed verse to one of our tunes.

The next morning the pack boarded a boat with around 30 Saigon hashers and off we went for the run. The Saigon H3 had done a 12km run the day prior so were a little weary as were the P2H3 after their 14 hour bus ride. None-the-less a number of runners set off with Yap Yap off at a good pace in order to snap some photos and Naomi showing all the Saigon Hash her derriere as we went through a pleasant route amongst the canals of Can Tho. The circle saw the return of the aubergine, exquisitely dressed in its P2H3 silk tie, and the admission by Fester that he as actually Festering Chronic Masturbator, a fact he somehow forgot to convey to the Saigon Hash during his stay in Ho Chi Minh. Mighty Quinn was also forced by Tokyo Joe to admit that her mother hash was not the Saigon Hash as she has always claimed but in reality the P2H3. A day for releasing suppressed information indeed.

Many thanks go to Good to the Last Drop and the GM Woofter for putting on a good show and showering us with left over t-shirts from some abstract joint run they had with the Vung Tau Hash years in the past. We look forward to reciprocating at some stage when the trauma of the bus ride is but a faded memory.

The hash then split with some heading off to Ho Chi Minh and the rest boarding yet another bus for the trip to Ha Tien, beaches and lovely Vietnamese waitresses. However that is another story……

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Advertorial: Velkommen Inn Velcomes Hash

Posted by p2h3hashtrash on April 16, 2008

FRB Herring Choker and his better half Thida invited Hashers to the opening of their new guesthouse/bar, the Velkommen Inn.

On hearing the words ‘free Anchor’, Hashers rampaged down to Street 104 like Vikings on an Orkney monastery, drinking and eating everything in sight. New GM Blah Blah offered up a Hash blessing then it was back to the pillaging. A few hashers propped up the very comfortable bar into the early hours, telling stories of North Sea whale hunts from yesteryore.

The Velkommen Inn offers pleasant rooms in a tourist-friendly location near the bus, boat and Wat Phnom. Plenty of girly bars nearby and they also have monkeys, if that’s your thing.

Posted in Announcements | 3 Comments »

P2H3 Run #849 – The Jelly Shot Hash

Posted by p2h3hashtrash on April 10, 2008

GPS Trail for Run 849

 P2H3  

 Run Date: 06/04/2006

Hares: Blah Blah, Love Bite

Run Report: Love Bite

 The #849th run of the P2H3 was south of the city a mere 10km to Preak Thmei, close to the spot of Chinese New Year hash, a clear favorite of Blah Blah. Hares were Blah Blah and Love Bite (on her maiden hare) who mercifully set a shortish 7km course, taking pity on those brave swimmers & kayakers who crossed the Mekong for the annual Mekong River Swim that morning (incidentally, an event crazy enough to be started by P2H3 10 years ago).

The departure was overseen by a gaggle of nuns, with FRB’s Ikea, Nora Petty, Rubbed Raw & Runs Well leading us down the many sneakily- marked false trails. The pack wound back and forth, crossing and recrossing the same path which the walkers took on the straight and narrow through the woods, then bashed through the shiggy* and the flower fields. Clearly, there were opportunities for blatant shortcutting by Blitzkrieg & Flip Flop along with virgins Makenzi Travis & Marleen Schiereck. At the Halfway was a downdown of tequila jello shooters homemade by Love Bite in full Martha Stewart Mode. The rain started pouring, and the rest of the run was blissfully cool and a bit tipsy as the tequila did its job.

An Erection took place in the circle, with Blah Blah being erected as the new Grand Master to fill the spot of Black Out’s lamented departure. The Religious Advisor position to fill Blah Blah place is now up for the taking, a heated race which will surely bring controversy and perhaps a few impassioned emails from Tokyo Joe on the subject. Virgins were were rampant, and Julia Fesenberg, Makenzi Travis, Douglas Gillison, Jacklyn Fernandez, Marleen Schiereck, Minh Trinh, Paul Reynaldo, & Scott Bales were indoctrinated into hash rituals with a down down, many of whom were repeatedly punished for drinking with the right hand. Hash Choirmaster Leaking Duck led the chants swinging the hash, um, “linga baton”, which was ceremonially placed in the circle afterwards and offered a potty of beer to appease the gods.

The end of the circle got a little hazy, but hash snaps reveal that the On On BBQ at Blah Blah and Yap Yap’s house in honor of Blackout and Insider’s lamented departure to Jakarta featured the superb Dan’s Meats sausages and buckets of green stuff for the veggies in the group. Bronco Buster regaled all with tales from the Perth Interhash (in her stylish, distinctly un-hashlike garden dress) and flourished a magic top hat retrieved in Perth that was stolen from P2H3 years ago by a rival hash. The meaning of the hat, like much that evening, remains a bit fuzzy. BB, any insight? Tokyo Joe started a music-less tango which ended when the beer was spilled (shame shame) and we all rolled home and collapsed into a food coma. On on to hash run #850…

Posted in Outstanding Haring, Run Report | 1 Comment »

Stop Press: P2H3 Banned by Phnom Penh Authorities!

Posted by p2h3hashtrash on April 1, 2008

Its official, the Phnom Penh Hash has been banned by Phnom Penh Authorities! An official letter received today from Phnom Penh municipality has ordered that the P2H3 stop their activities immediately.The letter, sent to the GM states that an outraged high ranking PP Municipality official saw the new P2H3 banner with the words “Drinking Club with a Running Problem” on the truck on Sunday and sent an immediate memo requesting the club be disbanded. Reasons were cited that for the health of the Cambodian people, sport and alcoholism should not be encouraged together. If the Hash meets again this Sunday the Police will be called in to disband the gathering.

P2H3 Mismanagement committee members will be meeting the PP Municipality soon to try to resolve the situation. GM Blackout hopes that by changing the banner and apologising to the Municipality that we may be able to appease the authorities and continue the P2H3 runs. Hash Trash will report the latest situation after this emergency meeting. Sunday’s run may of course be called off, so watch this space!

Posted in Announcements | 4 Comments »